Ireland in 2020

I read an article this week which suggested that there’s a property boom in my home county, Galway. In the article it was warned that this could be a ‘false market’. Meaning there’s a surge in spending but it’s an anomaly and won’t continue. For anybody in Ireland or even maybe any who left, you may frequent sites like Daft.ie, looking at the price of homes back in Ireland. If you look at the likes of Galway, Clare, Mayo, Dublin. Homes are cheaper than back in say, 2006 but they have not fallen that much. If you want a home for a family in Galway you can expect to pay at least 120k.

In 2008,2009 Graduates in the Tech field were starting on 19k-22k. When I left in 2012, my employer was entering it’s 6th year of a pay freeze. So you have people who hit the glass ceiling in their jobs, people taking new jobs for less pay and expensive home and rent that has barely budged. Grocery stores have come up with ways to appeal to customers with less money, with 3 for 10 euro deals and the such, but the essentials have either not changed or increased in price. So, what happens when the cost of living hasn’t adjusted much, when there’s mass exodus from the country, when the people who are around have significantly less money and the many counties main employers are public bodies? The House of Cards is shaky at best. So here’s my prediction for Ireland in 2020.

People in jobs will need to work on much longer, retirement may not be an option for most. These jobs which would be created from people retiring in years gone past, won’t exist. Young people will continue to emigrate, initially for the wrong reasons, going to the nearest party town, coming back and using the dole as a stop gap before their next move. College Grants and Dole money to young people will not have any significant Return on Investment. The government will continue to invest in Education without addressing the Elephant in the room, the fact that Irish third level institutions are shit. The government will continue to pander to IT companies, whilst simultaneously investing in education for the next breed of Tech graduates, only they’ll put the money in the hands of somebody who has no idea about the relevant trends and the courses will remain obsolete. Countries such as Hungary will start to get more IT jobs due to their highly skilled work force and the fact they can speak multiple languages including English proficiently. There will be no choice, the banks will have ramped up foreclosures of homes. The price will drop dramatically, People from other European countries will buy up property and the re-building process will begin. This is when I strike!

I will buy a small village just outside Galway City for 80k euro. I will rent homes to the locals in return for them providing me with both their lady folk and entertainment through song and dance. The town shall be renamed ‘Rory’s Cock’, for the sole purpose of me being able to tell Ladies, You should see ‘Rory’s Cock, it’s the size of a small town’ I shall ban RTE in all forms from the town, punishable by death. All print media will not be allowed, This blog will become the towns only news source as my sophisticated Firewall will block all other news sites. Finally, I will pay the Irish government enough money to grant me independence, Steve, myself and a few of the other lads will bring the boys over at Fifa out on the tear and convince them to allow us to play in the World Cup Qualifiers. Our main Sponsors will be Top Deck Bars and Sausage Rolls, because I enjoy them. We will of course not qualify for the tournament, however, this site will report that we did qualify and they decided to just give us the World Cup trophy rather than play in the tournament. My reign of tyranny shall last exactly 7 years until I die from the worlds most powerful ograsm caused by my own feeling of self worth

Rory

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About thecityfathers

We sit around all day stroking our beards, clucking our tongues and discussing what's to be done with this Homer Simpson
This entry was posted in A Gentlemans Guide and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Ireland in 2020

  1. Emily Ruman says:

    You have a lot of free time on your hands. That must be nice.

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