Are you single? Alone? Bored? Penniless? Horny? Fret no more dear reader The City Fathers are here to help…apart from the horny part…go find another website for that, I’d say there’s one or two out there.
Today on Steves Cookery Corner I will teach you how to make a tasty dish to impress the ladies, a gentlemans Spaghetti Bolognese. Firstly you’re going to need to run out to the supermarket to pick up some stuff – namely frozen spaghetti bolognese and frozen garlic bread.
Alright we are back. Now, I realise how difficult making this dish is so I will utilise some photographic aids.
Firstly, start up your oven…you will need it soon bro! Next, grab a plate (really any kind of plate you have lying around will do) and place the meat bag on it. Carefully pierce the bag first. Then grab the spaghetti bag and do the same!
Now, this is the tricky part! You need to put the meat in the microwave (really any microwave you have lying around will do) for 2 minutes alone. When that is done pop the spaghetti bag in along side it for a further 4 minutes.
Now remember earlier when I told you to pre heat your oven and you looked around the room confused as to why an oven would be needed for this particular dish? Garlic Bread of course!
Carefully remove the packaging, seriously it will NOT taste well, before placing the baguette (that’s French for cock-bread) in your pre-heated oven.
So you’ve got your spaghetti bolognese in the microwave and you garlic bread in the oven so now it’s time to play the waiting game. I know what you are thinking “The waiting game sucks! Let’s play Hungry Hungry Hippos” but no! It’s time to prepare your beverage good sir. This meal will be hot and filling. You are going to need something light and tasty…like a fine 2012 Mi Wadi.
It can be tricky here. You need to pour just a little into the glass. BUT DON’T DRINK IT YET!! The Mi Wadi at the bottom of the glass needs to be garnished with lashings of water first! Undiluted Mi Wadi is actually weapons-grade uranium! Allow me to show you.
By the time you figure out the best ratio of mi wadi to water your food will be ready. See…it served a purpose. Grab a plate, let the spaghetti fall out of the increasingly hot plastic bag container and on to the plate. Next, lovingly dispatch the meat (oddly enough thats the name of the upcoming city fathers porno) from it’s container and on top of the spaghetti.
By now your garlic bread will be golden brown so remove it from the oven, slice it up and place it around the plate in strategic eating positions. And serve…
Mmmmmm it would make cartoon characters float! Who says fine dining needs to be expensive?
Total Cost – €4.28 Have that recession!!
I really tied the flow to the motif,