Walking the line of Steve

So it’s 10pm on the first night of the Volvo Ocean Race festival and as you already know I live in the very, very, very centre of Galway City. I love it and I would not pick another place on the earth that I would prefer to live…except for a corporate box in Old Trafford with a nice king sized bed drenched in raining Scarlett Johansens…but that’s for my lottery win, moving on.

So I get home around 9pm and there is a car parked outside my house with five or six guys drinking within it’s crappy walls. I pay no heed as they are not hurting anybody and I just want to eat my take away. About 20 minutes ago one of them threw a bottle of buckfast at the back wall of the area beside my place which leaves shattered glass all over an area I have to clean before a city warden FINES ME for litter…makes sense right? #Galway

I “confronted” one of the respectable gentlemen about the act and his answer was this…

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“Ah man! That wasn’t us! Some lad threw it and ran away, swear to god man!”

I just explained how unlikely that was to the fella and went inside to grab a pair of gloves and a bin bag (garbage bag to our American friends but I guess you figured that out folks?) to pick up the glass. It was then that I discovered multiple cans of Bulmers, Budweiser and Heineken also thrown in there. I looked at the lads who had already vacated the car to attempt to help me clean up and what were they drinking…yes…Bulmers, Budweiser and Heinken…shockingly I was correct in my film noire detective assumption that it was, in fact, those losers that threw the bottle…

They explained that they didn’t know that somebody lived there and they apologised profusely before I spoke again. I had a few words for them…

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If one more can is thrown in here again tonight I am going to knock one of you out…don’t try me.

They seemed scared and I went inside…they did not drive away however. Do they have no shame? So, we are here, 20 minutes later and they just left for the pub. Before the idiots left they threw another bottle at the wall and ran away laughing, I was not shocked. You can teach a man to fish but you can’t teach 18-21 year old weed smoking guys to feel remorse. So maybe it is time to do that.

Remember I mentioned that they were drinking in a parked car outside my house while throwing cans over the gate? And now they are gone to the pub? It doesn’t take a genius to figure out what they left behind – and is outside my house…THE CAR. I gave them a chance…I allowed them to continue to drink away even after pissing me off and betraying my trust. Maybe they need to be taught a lesson?

I could very easily let the air out of the tires, you know by using a kitchen knife several times on each tire. I could easily kick both wing mirrors off. I could easily smash the windscreen with any of the conveniently placed kegs outside the pub next door. I could easily rip that car to shreds. I could easily do anything I want to this car and get away with it while every resident on this street would applaud my actions and call me sir…but I won’t do that. I am not one of these idiots. One day they will do this to the wrong guy and pay violently for it. Not tonight though, they caught me on a good night…lucky f**kers.

Who loves orange soda,


About thecityfathers

We sit around all day stroking our beards, clucking our tongues and discussing what's to be done with this Homer Simpson
This entry was posted in Living in Galway City and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to Walking the line of Steve

  1. unknown says:

    this is not the steve i remember the old steve would have turned the car into a convertible and put a sign on it saying who ever can dump the most disgusting twisted thing they can think of in the car would win a lifetimes supply of usa assorted biscuits and barrys tea bags.This “new steve” is soft and but a shadow of the old steve

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